My youngest grandson, Parker, is about to turn 5 soon. When he was over the other day, I realized just how fortunate I was to get to watch him in pretend play. It is the sweetest, most entertaining thing ever. Sometimes he engages me in the pretend play, and other times he does it on his own while I just watch and listen in. But, either way, watching him create experiences from his imagination is one of the best things this Nana gets to witness.
It dawned on me while Parker was playing the other day that there are some parents and grandparents that never have that opportunity. They don’t know the pure joy of seeing that type of creative, wholesome, play take place because their children/grandchildren are either plugged in to a device or involved in only structured activities. I really try not to use the word hate, so I won’t, but I will tell you that I really, REALLY dislike devices for kids. If you have followed me for any length of time, you already know this. The younger the child, the more I dislike seeing them on any sort of device. It saddens me because of what they AREN’T doing instead. That isn’t to say that screens don’t have value in certain situations, because they can, but if your child doesn’t pretend play, they are missing out and they aren’t the only ones. They are missing valuable learning and growth opportunities, and parents or grandparents are missing fleeting chances to play, engage, and teach alongside them. The adults are also missing out on important perspective and insights into that child. I learn so much about Parker by watching and listening to him play alone and with others.
On one of my recent Nana days with Parker, he walked into the living room wearing a plastic yellow hard hat, with plastic pliers and a real flashlight in hand. I was folding clothes and he asked me if I needed any work done on the house. He asked with the seriousness of a contractor at the home of a new client. He was “in character” for sure. Being caught off guard I didn’t have a specific “need” in mind, so I asked him what he thought I needed done. He decided that our water dispenser could use a coat of paint. I asked if he had a paint brush, or if he needed me to supply it, and he said he needed mine. I brought him a brush and he set about “painting” the water dispenser. He then made a “wet paint” sign, and he told me not to touch it because it would take 7 minutes to dry. I got to choose the paint color, he shared his process… It was a whole, awesome, thing. After that he went to work under the sink. I don’t remember now what his vision was for beneath my sink, but he definitely had one. Parker played “contractor guy” for nearly an hour, with only occasional input from me when he wanted it.
Sometimes the family room floor is either water or hot lava that Parker navigates by trying to get from the loveseat to the couch or vice versa without touching the water/lava. (With a water or lava suit and other specialized tools, obviously.) A couple of weeks ago he was the owner of a furniture store. Furniture Warehouse to be exact. He asked if I wanted any chairs, which I did, of course. Two. And a new couch. He giggled and proceeded to escort me around the showroom. He delivered my chairs and couch in his “truck” that he backed up to my house. He only charged me two dollars! It was hard to say who was having more fun. Nana or Parker.
Pretend play, playing outdoors, playing with other children, are all important to child development. It’s how kids learn to be creative, to explore, foster friendships, practice inclusion, patience, turn taking, etc. Those important life skills are rarely learned on an iPhone, tablet, or whatever other device makes into the hands of a child. If pretend playing isn’t something your child normally does, the next time you get a chance, just ask them if they want to play pretend? Some will immediately have ideas about what they want to do, and others won’t but, either way, I’m guessing they will be thrilled you want to play too.